You know what you want, you just don’t want to hear it

Maybe you can relate to this situation: You would like to make a change in your life but don’t know what you want. You want to find your passion. Or to make a radical change but you want it to be the “right” decision. Perhaps you feel stuck and you assume it’s because you take things too seriously and tend to overthink. Maybe you have even had some bad experiences in the past.

Here is the truth: You know what you want. You know what to do. You just don’t want to hear it.

Whatever your current situation is, what would you do if there were no consequences whatsoever? I’m serious, think about it. Let your imagination go. What would you do first? And then? What would you say if there were no consequences? How would that feel – doing what you really enjoy? Who would you become, being free from consequences and doing what matters to you?

Great.

And now reflect on what were the factors that you have “removed” when you imagined the consequence-free situation? Perhaps it was the risk of failure or going broke. Maybe the need for approval from your peers and family. The possibility of disappointing yourself or another. Whatever it was, what is your ultimate fear behind all that?

Now you see: You know what you want, you are just afraid of the consequences. You hesitate in acknowledging what is important to you because once you do it, you would need to act upon it – and that is not always easy. It might require a lot of effort, courage and taking a risk of failing or rejection. And this is the trap many of us fall into:

We are already passionate about something but we keep waiting for something else to be passionate about and pursue it without fear of any possible consequences.

When do you think this ideal situation will come? And where was this important and unbeknownst, secret hassle-free “passion” hidden from us all along?

I’m sorry to disappoint you, but the chance that you are going to suddenly discover a new, completely unknown passion that you will pursue without a second’s hesitation is pretty low. You already know your passion. In fact, there are many things you are passionate and care about. You know what you find important. You just don’t take it seriously, because you are afraid.

What is the price you are paying for not facing your fears?

Your time is limited so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.
— Steve Jobs

Originally posted on May 29, 2019

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